NF’s the search, a reflection of humanity as a whole?
You may not know it, but I have been a fan of NF for a few years. He is a rapper, who often talks about his faith, but also is not one to paint things in a rosy picture. His music often speaks to his mindset, his struggles, and his victories. He writes what he thinks, and it’s often raw and real. NF has often taken a lot of heat from the Christian community, and I can understand why.
However as I turned on the Search, his fourth album, I began to listen through different ears.
You see when I first found NF he was speaking my language in ways I can’t explain. At the time I was not in a good place, and what I couldn’t express to others, I found in his music.
Now a year and a half later, I can say things have radically changed, I am in a better place, I have found victory over the many bondages that plagued me, and as I take a listen to NF’s latest offering, I find my heartbreaking for the man who was once someone with whom I commiserated at one point through the songs he wrote.
I don’t claim to know him, or the things he’s gone through, but I see the themes that come through, his struggles with his own thoughts, the doubts of his faith, his struggles with the fame he has, his being near suicide, his hate of himself, and so much more.
Yet I also see some positive sides, his willingness to bring these things to the light, to work them through in his music, and his desire to change the path he is going down, returning to God. I also don’t see as much arrogance as there was in his previous records. Not to say there isn’t that battle every other rapper mentality in some of his songs, but this album seems to take a darker, but more honest tone.
I won’t say that this is an album I will be listening to daily, as I prefer to have on praise and worship and think about things that will honor my Heavenly Father.
That said I do believe there are some things that we can learn from NF’s story.
First, don’t be afraid to be raw and be real with God. He can handle even the worst of things you have to throw at him, especially your anger, and pain. Burying stuff down and trying to pretend it doesn’t exist is only a recipe for more pain and destructive habits later on.
Second, don’t be afraid to ask for help One thing NF recounts in The Search is that he went to seek help to deal with the issues he had. Trust me, this is one of the best things you can do, if you are in that dark place, and don’t see a way out.
Third and finally, realize that we are in a war, and the war starts in our mind. I’ve been there, where NF describes in his music, feeling like my emotions, my thoughts are my own worst enemy, when all the while, the real enemy is Satan himself who has hated me because I am an image of the one who created me. My Lord and King Yeshua Hamashiach.
We must use the weapons of our warfare, we must use the armor that has been provided to us by God, and we must be willing to fight for the ground we gain, and then fight to keep it.
In conclusion, I have committed to pray for NF, that God will provide someone who can help him gain the victory he seeks, and get to a more stable footing with our Lord. I will also be praying, for all those who may find themselves in similar situations.
If this is you, please leave a comment, or e-mail me, and I will do my best to help.
God bless,
Teresa Blaes
P.S. If you want to hear the album for yourself click the link below.
